I spent some time playing Noob with a few friends in person today and to be honest, Noob isn't as bad as we're making him out to be.
Spirit ball is fast enough to throw out and get consistent chip. If they duck spirit ball, then it takes them the length of a tool album to get in on you.
B1, 1+3 is a great spacing tool that can net you close to 40% with one bar.
B3, 1+3 is another good spacing tool to get your opponent in the corner.
He has great ways to punish the opponent. A 7 string starter (1,1,3), but it's downside is it's short reach. One of Jax's strings that ends in an overhead is -7, but pushes him back far enough where 1,1,3 just misses. You'd have to punish with a de, or hope if you throw out f2 that he's mashing. He has an 8 string start (2,1,2), but it's downside is its scaling. His last punisher is f2,2,1,2 and that starts up at 9 frames and advances you forward. It's only downside is that you can't do much with it midscreen except end in an upknee. I use it as a combo ender after an amplified tele-slam. These seem like a fair trade off to be honest.
He has great damage when you spend meter. I noticed since I spend my time spacing and throwing out spirit balls when I can, so I usually have meter to spend.
He has great pokes. All his down pokes are fast and his d4 is deceiving.
Overall, Noob is a spacing character who will carry you to the corner and proceed to bull you. He is no longer the zoner we once knew.
I'd like to see shadow tackle be a bit faster and for upknee to have a better hitbox. There were points where upknee would glide though the top of someone's face of chest and it would not connect.
Outside of that, I feel his biggest issue is getting certain characters off of him. His 1,1,3 although fast has small reach. His b1 is slow enough to get stuffed up close. Outside of universal wakeups, the only tools you have to get out the corner are neutral jump into sickle teleport or d3, d2. D2 on block pushes the opponent off of you be a considerable amount. I've also been tick throwing a lot and seeing if I can get away with it. Seeks to work.
I like Noob. He's good. Not great, but good. Let's ride this train out, boy, and see where he takes us.