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Dyzvhtynzal

Dyzvhtynzal

Kombatant
Lol, no big deal. i put bird-like creatures in my story recently. they hoot like owls but howl when frightened. i called them Woop-woops. lol, yeah...dont feel bad.
 
Dyzvhtynzal

Dyzvhtynzal

Kombatant
@Indecisive
So... are you describing something that you think you become or already are? or something else? Or, are the 'bodies' your friends - abandoned when you transform? Missed messages from friends you've ignored? I'm trying here, help me out.
 
Indigeau

Indigeau

The April Fool
Just saw this thread and it makes me happy. I've tried my hand at writing and won a few contests where I live. It's something I really enjoy. Perhaps I shall post somewhat of a something at some point.

Maybe.

(if it's good enough)
 
Indecisive

Indecisive

We'll burn you all—that is your fate!
Dyzvhtynzal said:
@Indecisive
So... are you describing something that you think you become or already are? or something else? Or, are the 'bodies' your friends - abandoned when you transform? Missed messages from friends you've ignored? I'm trying here, help me out.
Click to expand...
Hehe. Well the title is called Mind. It is a reference towards the sort of thought process that goes on inside my head. To answer the First question it would be that i already am. As the original reflection is me and then it does start to change. So i understand that question. It can go either way really. In my mind i describe darkness and a chill. Which can be represented as bad thoughts. So in these thoughts in my mind you see that there are bodies on the ground. Of people who mean something to me. The missed messages are related to the fact of how long i have been in my own mind. Thats why i also mentioned Time being lost. Hope this helps. What did you think?
 
Dyzvhtynzal

Dyzvhtynzal

Kombatant
it's pretty good i guess. didnt blow me away. check out some of zoidbergs other stories around here. i liked the one with the artifact. forget what it's called.... prob 'the artifact' lol. yeah indecisive, show us more. we'll read it.not vn sure if zoidberg wrote that now.
THINK IT WAS "THE RELIC" now. who the hell knows? liked it.
 
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Indecisive

Indecisive

We'll burn you all—that is your fate!
Heres another.
Masks

R’yth

I sit and observe. The people go on with their day. They converse I observe. They buy food or drink I observe. They fight one another I observe. I rarely get looks from those who walk by. To them I’m just a random person. But as I observe I get noticed and the person keeps walking. I understand. As the person walks by I make note of their face. But not the face I see on the others. I see their real face. They have removed the mask that keeps them safe, the thing that people put on everyday to be a different person, the thing that we think we need. I watch as the people around me wear these masks. Although they look like normal people they are not who they really are. They don’t want others to see what they are because they are either afraid or they have been hurt. As more people walk by I see a girl walking by with her friends. She gives me a quick glance and I see that her mask is slowly cracking and I see tears. She wants to break the mask off but she is scared. I wish I could help those fully break free from their own illusion of what they think they are so they can be what they really are. I get up and start to walk. I pass a mirror by a store and look into it and see different facial features looking back at me. I smirk and continue to walk as a tear slowly drops from my eyes reflection.
 
Dyzvhtynzal

Dyzvhtynzal

Kombatant
First one was better. Confusing as to if people have masks on or not when you say. Not sure what's happening. Maybe.......you're the only one really wearing a mask and everyone else is authentic. Take off your mask and you'll be able to tell better.
 
BlastX21

BlastX21

Mortal
I've toyed around with the idea of a story based around a man who develops a unique form of narcolepsy. This condition causes him to fall asleep uncontrollably whenever his heart rate reaches a certain rate. The implication of this is that any significant emotion causes him to fall unconscious for 2-5 hours, although it can be longer if the emotion is particularly strong. The story would revolve around his struggles to deal with his condition. It would clearly cripple his life, as excitement, anxiety, strong happiness, or stress of any kind would cause him to fall asleep. I imagine the main character as being a very jubilant, outgoing, and likeable person to start the story, but slowly be forced to transform into a depressed loner as the story goes on.

I came up with the idea after watching a youtube video of a narcoleptic dog who had the same condition. It can't even eat without falling asleep, because the idea of food makes it excited. The video was extremely sad and got me riled up emotionally. One of the key elements of a story is to elicit emotions in the reader, as emotional involvement is one of the key differences between your average book on the library shelf and a New York Times bestseller. I think this is a story that could be very powerful to the reader, if executed correctly, as they read about the main character's journey through his condition.

Unfortunently, I've never written anything in my life, but maybe this is something I could start with.

Also, I would be interested in hearing some plot ideas you guys have yourselves, but haven't put into action yet. Plot speculation is always fun.
 
D

Deleted member 28105

Guest
BlastX21 said:
I've toyed around with the idea of a story based around a man who develops a unique form of narcolepsy. This condition causes him to fall asleep uncontrollably whenever his heart rate reaches a certain rate. The implication of this is that any significant emotion causes him to fall unconscious for 2-5 hours, although it can be longer if the emotion is particularly strong. The story would revolve around his struggles to deal with his condition. It would clearly cripple his life, as excitement, anxiety, strong happiness, or stress of any kind would cause him to fall asleep. I imagine the main character as being a very jubilant, outgoing, and likeable person to start the story, but slowly be forced to transform into a depressed loner as the story goes on.

I came up with the idea after watching a youtube video of a narcoleptic dog who had the same condition. It can't even eat without falling asleep, because the idea of food makes it excited. The video was extremely sad and got me riled up emotionally. One of the key elements of a story is to elicit emotions in the reader, as emotional involvement is one of the key differences between your average book on the library shelf and a New York Times bestseller. I think this is a story that could be very powerful to the reader, if executed correctly, as they read about the main character's journey through his condition.

Unfortunently, I've never written anything in my life, but maybe this is something I could start with.

Also, I would be interested in hearing some plot ideas you guys have yourselves, but haven't put into action yet. Plot speculation is always fun.
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That's brilliant, I would definitely read that. It would be interesting to see what psychological developments would be created through out the story, and I'm curious to see how you might portray a character that is constantly unconscious. Would it be written in the 1st person, or the 3rd person?
 
Dyzvhtynzal

Dyzvhtynzal

Kombatant
A condition exists already in humans where something as simple as being startled or surprised can put one to sleep instantly. It's rare of course.
There's also a more sinister, though opposite condition I believe, where one can't fall asleep and ultimately, inevitably dies.

Sleeping Beauty or whatever it's called is also interesting. Some people unfortunately have this condition where they sleep for days.....even a week at a time.
 
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REYTHEGREAT

REYTHEGREAT

..........................
for those who like to write, how about reading Less Than Zero and writing me an essay with a topic of sex and gender. :)
 
BlastX21

BlastX21

Mortal
REYTHEGREAT said:
for those who like to write, how about reading Less Than Zero and writing me an essay with a topic of sex and gender. :)
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Lol. I'm guessing this is a school assignment? I'm surprised that any high school would allow their students to read that book. Its pretty explicit.
 
REYTHEGREAT

REYTHEGREAT

..........................
BlastX21 said:
Lol. I'm guessing this is a school assignment? I'm surprised that any high school would allow their students to read that book. Its pretty explicit.
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haha yea, but its for my college class and yes, that book its nuts. good book though.
 
Dyzvhtynzal

Dyzvhtynzal

Kombatant
Anybody working on a story we can read? I have someone doing a final read on mine. Then I get to decide if I'm going to drop $300+ on a professional edit/proofread. After that I have to come up with a book proposal/query letter. Sure it will be fun. Thought I'd be done with this by now, but I keep running into problems. Haven't given up though. Can't after all my work. And work it is.
 
TheGabStandard

TheGabStandard

The anticipation is killing me
I am currently co-writing a novel at the moment. We have done a first draft but now in the middle of revising it.

What kind of story are you writing? Hope everything goes well for you on the publishing front :)
 
Dyzvhtynzal

Dyzvhtynzal

Kombatant
@nyjetsrulz87
It's a fantasy tale. If it gets accepted, I'll give free copies to everyone. I'll admit that I'm never optimistic though. It's a scourge of mine. It'll probably end up bundled on Amazon with my last failure.
Good luck to you as well.
 
FOREVER EL1TE

FOREVER EL1TE

Warrior
Dyzvhtynzal said:
Sorry MKillBill.

Actually, this is what the letter said..

Thank you for submitting "Descending Shade," but I'm going to pass on it. The story couldn't grab my interest, I'm afraid. Good luck to you with this one, and thanks for sending it our way.

The assistant editor signed it then.
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Is it to late for me too say something or you already published the book?
 
TheGabStandard

TheGabStandard

The anticipation is killing me
Dyzvhtynzal said:
@nyjetsrulz87
It's a fantasy tale. If it gets accepted, I'll give free copies to everyone. I'll admit that I'm never optimistic though. It's a scourge of mine. It'll probably end up bundled on Amazon with my last failure.
Good luck to you as well.
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Nice, fantasy is the genre I'm aiming to write in as well. Can I ask why aren't you optimistic about your story being a success? Unless its more prevention from you building high hopes in case it doesn't get published.

Many thanks for the well wishes. I am still kind of new to the whole writing world so if people don't mind I will post some small works to be critiqued. They won't be from the novel itself but just stand-alone scenes involving characters from the novel. I know there is definitely room for improvement in my writing but some guidance/advice would be much appreciated :).
 
Dyzvhtynzal

Dyzvhtynzal

Kombatant
Let's see some.
I have been told and read that non-fiction is a better route to go, and I think I'm knowledgeable enough to write it, but, I want to write dark fantasies. I go wherever my heart takes me I guess. I'll be picking up pieces of it off the floor in a few months.

@FOREVEREL1TE

Lol. Say whatever you want.
 
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