rev0lver
Come On Die Young
Have you ever heard Tom Brady laugh? I thought I had too until I thought about it more. Most of us have heard Tom Brady speak many times, whether it be on podcasts, on streams, or in person at a tournament. His demeanor can often be a jolly one, infusing troll-speak into his stories and commentary, but at no point will we actually hear a human laugh. We hear little things like "Man these Jax players are the worst!!!!" spoken in a hearty laughing voice, but this may be faked.
What is happening here? Is Tom Brady a government plant to infiltrate subgroups of the population? Is he even human? I decided to do my own digging to uncover the dark secrets of his past to discover who this man REALLY is. Brady appears to spend most of the year traveling the country, training in Mortal Kombat at various players homes for days or weeks at a time in New York, Virginia, Illinois, Ohio, and other states. No one truly knows where this wanderer comes from.
Except for one connection. Tom Brady is known to train near his home at the "House of Goons" in Texas. Prominent Tekken players such as JOP and Eddie Pistons train here as well, so I decided to find out what this House was really about. When I finally found the location of this place, there was something quite peculiar about it. This was no house, nor an apartment, or even a gaming center. The address on the map was a large property with a desolate surrounding of trees and dirt roads. Upon further research, this address led to a long-abandoned mental hospital, with rumors of satanic gatherings and paranormal experiences. I needed to find more.
Thankfully, over this long winter break I have had a lot of free time to do as I please. I decided to take a trip over there myself to investigate this place and find out what was going on. I rented a car and drove down winding country roads to venture to this place alone, a clear mistake. As I crept up to the front gates, plastered with "Private Property" signs and surrounded by barbed wire, I began to feel a sense of dread. Waves of panic and anxiety swept through my body as I entered this dark, decrepit behemoth of a building.
I started calling out: "TOM! Are you in here?!". The place was silent. But the building was so huge, there must be something of importance to find here, so I continued to explore. I checked my phone, but there was no signal. Then I checked something else… I was getting a wifi connection! The name of the connection was "DOASUX", a possible reference to Tom Brady's past. But could it just be a coincidence? I didn't remember seeing anything nearby on the map, but it could be coming from some other area. I needed to keep looking.
After checking most of the front offices and waiting areas, filled with nothing but abandoned desks, filing cabinets, and rats, I ventured further into the patient wing of the facility. I found one room separated from most of the residential areas, with what appeared to be surgery equpiment. "What did they do to people here?" I wondered. As I slowly walked into the room to inspect the scene, I thought I heard a whisper. Was I losing my mind? I had sworn I heard something. Then it got louder.
"Let's be serious here"
Someone was there.
"Hello?", I called out.
"Let's be serious here".
I knew that voice. I've heard it a million times. It was Tom.
"LET'S BE SEEEEEERIOUS HERE"
I was scared. I didn't know what was going to happen to me. I started running for the exit.
Suddenly a door opened at the end of the hallway and Tom Brady himself stepped out.
"REVOLVER YOU FUCKING SCRUB GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE! YOU FUCKING KITANA PLAYERS MANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN"
His mouth turned into a wide and devilish grin as "mannnnnn" continued to echo throughout the hallway. His eyes turned pitch black and he started running after me with an inhuman speed. I continued to run without looking back. It was my only chance. Suddenly I heard a deafening bang and everything went silent. I looked behind me and he had disappeared.
I exited the building and left as fast as I could, not knowing what I had just experienced. Something sinister is going on here. All I can tell you is to not go looking for that place.
What is happening here? Is Tom Brady a government plant to infiltrate subgroups of the population? Is he even human? I decided to do my own digging to uncover the dark secrets of his past to discover who this man REALLY is. Brady appears to spend most of the year traveling the country, training in Mortal Kombat at various players homes for days or weeks at a time in New York, Virginia, Illinois, Ohio, and other states. No one truly knows where this wanderer comes from.
Except for one connection. Tom Brady is known to train near his home at the "House of Goons" in Texas. Prominent Tekken players such as JOP and Eddie Pistons train here as well, so I decided to find out what this House was really about. When I finally found the location of this place, there was something quite peculiar about it. This was no house, nor an apartment, or even a gaming center. The address on the map was a large property with a desolate surrounding of trees and dirt roads. Upon further research, this address led to a long-abandoned mental hospital, with rumors of satanic gatherings and paranormal experiences. I needed to find more.
Thankfully, over this long winter break I have had a lot of free time to do as I please. I decided to take a trip over there myself to investigate this place and find out what was going on. I rented a car and drove down winding country roads to venture to this place alone, a clear mistake. As I crept up to the front gates, plastered with "Private Property" signs and surrounded by barbed wire, I began to feel a sense of dread. Waves of panic and anxiety swept through my body as I entered this dark, decrepit behemoth of a building.
I started calling out: "TOM! Are you in here?!". The place was silent. But the building was so huge, there must be something of importance to find here, so I continued to explore. I checked my phone, but there was no signal. Then I checked something else… I was getting a wifi connection! The name of the connection was "DOASUX", a possible reference to Tom Brady's past. But could it just be a coincidence? I didn't remember seeing anything nearby on the map, but it could be coming from some other area. I needed to keep looking.
After checking most of the front offices and waiting areas, filled with nothing but abandoned desks, filing cabinets, and rats, I ventured further into the patient wing of the facility. I found one room separated from most of the residential areas, with what appeared to be surgery equpiment. "What did they do to people here?" I wondered. As I slowly walked into the room to inspect the scene, I thought I heard a whisper. Was I losing my mind? I had sworn I heard something. Then it got louder.
"Let's be serious here"
Someone was there.
"Hello?", I called out.
"Let's be serious here".
I knew that voice. I've heard it a million times. It was Tom.
"LET'S BE SEEEEEERIOUS HERE"
I was scared. I didn't know what was going to happen to me. I started running for the exit.
Suddenly a door opened at the end of the hallway and Tom Brady himself stepped out.
"REVOLVER YOU FUCKING SCRUB GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE! YOU FUCKING KITANA PLAYERS MANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN"
His mouth turned into a wide and devilish grin as "mannnnnn" continued to echo throughout the hallway. His eyes turned pitch black and he started running after me with an inhuman speed. I continued to run without looking back. It was my only chance. Suddenly I heard a deafening bang and everything went silent. I looked behind me and he had disappeared.
I exited the building and left as fast as I could, not knowing what I had just experienced. Something sinister is going on here. All I can tell you is to not go looking for that place.